Firing A Family Member Or A Dear Friend. Did You Ever Think That It Might Be Your Fault?

It seems like aeons ago since I was involved in the rough-and-tumble world of advertising and working for multinationals around the world.  At one point during my career, I had the privilege of working for Ogilvy & Mather in London, New Zealand and Australia.

It was an agency I admired and loved. Their philosophy was something I thrived on, and I found that clients who placed their collective belief in the firm, in most cases, saw their brands flourish.

At the time, its founder, David Ogilvy, ruled his global empire like a king from the sanctuary of his castle in France. It always amazed me that he could keep tabs on every aspect of the worldwide business by simply dispatching copious faxes to the heads of every office each day.

During my time with them I was posted (banished?) to the small island of New Zealand along with renowned mountaineer Robert Anderson to set up the Ogilvy Direct network throughout the country.

On my first day, I found a Russian doll on my desk, dispatched from that formidable castle in France. Taking apart the dolls, I eventually got to the last tiny one. Inside, I found a handwritten note.

It read; 

“ Congratulations, now remember the following. If you surround yourself with people who are better than you, you will become a company of giants. Surround yourself with people who are lesser than you, and you will remain a company of dwarves.”

David.

He was renowned for keeping watch over thousands of staff, peppering us with faxes, advising on headlines, strategy and berating anyone who used reverse type (an offence that could get one fired). His advice on hiring and firing always returned to the same theme.

Never, ever hire your friends or family members, for at some point, you will have to fire them. Oh, how I wish I had retained that wisdom! When I ran my own agency, I certainly followed the rule of hiring people far brighter and more talented than I was, and because of that, we thrived and often created stunning work. However, there were times when my reason lapsed and I succumbed to hiring talented friends, forgetting that on their first day on the job, they were no longer friends but paid employees.

One particular creative whom I had hired for years was a good friend, and when he applied for a job, I jumped at the chance to have his talent on board. Big mistake!!! For a while, he performed like a trained seal and produced some fine creative work, but as a ‘friend’, he began to abuse the privilege of his employment.

He would berate me for the way I ran the company; he started to undermine his colleagues using his friendship with the ‘boss’ as a strategic play in the inevitable game of office politics, and finally, he began to put far too much ‘Bolivian marching powder’ up his nose that was good for him and indeed us.

I was compelled without warning to fire him!

His devastation is something I will never forget. This talented man, with family and a fair-sized mortgage, could not believe that I was letting him go.

“ But I’m your mate,” he said, “You can’t fire me.”

“ I just did.” I replied, “

It was my mistake, for really, you simply can’t pay your friends. We never spoke again! Sadly, I repeated this mistake a few more times, all with the same result, and once I even briefly hired my daughter during her university holidays.

That saga lasted less than three weeks before she received her marching orders from me. She was astounded when I told her that she was abusing her position simply because she was related to the boss. Happily, she has gone on to forge a very successful career in the film industry.
Firing people is an unfortunate aspect of running a business, yet it is a necessary evil, but it doesn’t make it any easier, and firing family or friends can have lifelong consequences. People who enjoy the exercise of letting people go, for whatever reason, will, in my opinion, never achieve greatness.

Now I know that many will disagree with this diatribe, as one only has to look at the Murdochs to see how a family can grow a business. ( Although we all know how that saga has played out!)

Paul v Walters is the author of several novels and an anthology of short stories. His latest offering, RITUAL, was launched at the Ubud International Readers & Writers Festival in late 2025.